


Chapter 2: The Long Goodbye

by TruebornAlpha



Series: The Road Not Taken [2]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Bottom Shiro (Voltron), Cuddles, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Time, Fluff and Smut, Garrison Sheith, Gentle Dom, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, Nightmares, Pre-Kerberos Mission, SHEITH - Freeform, Sex, Smut, power bottom Shiro
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-05
Updated: 2016-08-05
Packaged: 2018-07-29 14:21:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7687822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TruebornAlpha/pseuds/TruebornAlpha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As the Kerberos mission draws near, Shiro is set to make history. Keith can't ask his best friend to stay, but he can ask him to come home. Until then, all they have is one last goodbye.</p><p>Shiro and Keith have another chance to redo their mistakes from the past and finally be happy, but nothing is ever that simple.</p><p>(Gentle Dom Shiro, VERY NSFW)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Chapter 2: The Long Goodbye

Keith hated the summer.

Truth be told, he hated all the other seasons too, but summer was the worst. At least when he’d been at school or in the Garrison, he could work himself into exhaustion, filling his time with studying and training in a never ending cycle. During the summer, it was harder to ignore that he was alone. Ever since the accident, he’d bounced between foster families, never staying anywhere long enough to feel like home. The Garrison had allowed him to stay in the barracks over the summer break now that he was 18 and on his own, but the hallways were empty and the other students had gone home weeks ago.

He ran laps around the compound each day and trained alone to keep himself sharp, trying to remember all the movements Shiro had taught him. He filled hours with books, cramming as much into his head on piloting techniques and everything he’d need to give him an edge in the next semester. It wasn’t enough to keep out the silence that settled over his life and he spent days at a time without speaking to another soul.

There was too much time in the day, and it was all too easy to miss Shiro when he was alone.

The Kerberos mission was just days away and Shiro had barely had a moment to himself between the intensive training and final preparations for launch. It was all anyone could talk about, Keith couldn’t even turn on the television without being bombarded with eager reporters talking about humanity’s big leap to the edge of the solar system. He’d once flipped passed to see Shiro’s face on the screen, as calm and charming as ever as he fielded the reporter’s questions with ease. Keith didn’t think he took a breath until they went to a commercial break.

Shiro was out there, making a name for himself, proving his worth, and more importantly, he was living out his dream. Their dream. To see beyond the atmosphere, to touch the stars. Humanity was taking great leaps and strides, and Shiro was going to lead them into the future. Keith couldn’t begrudge him that. He just wished Shiro didn’t have to be so far away.

Every time he thought about the upcoming semester, a knot twisted in his belly. He’d used to dread starting his day, during his first few months in the Garrison. Long, tedious lectures were interrupted by messy fights, and some days, he’d loathed the idea of getting out of bed. Making friends had been difficult enough on its own, but with the added stress, Keith had withdrawn further into himself, more interested in his studies than in his colleagues anyway. His saving grace came twice a week, under the watchful eye of a senior officer as the cadets were trained in the flight simulator. And it was like nothing Keith had ever known.

He told himself it would be enough. The Galactic Garrison was the premier authority in interstellar exploration. Every pilot who’d flown farther than Jupiter for the past two decades had been affiliated with the Garrison in some way. They were the best the Earth had to offer, and more importantly, they were the only school who would take on an unemployed orphan with history of disciplinary action. He had no other choice. It  _had_ to be enough.

Then he’d met Shiro, and suddenly, everything stopped feeling like a chore. For the first time in his life, Keith had someone he could depend on, and beyond that, someone who did more than put up with him. He’d been terrified when he first met Shiro, certain the most popular senior in the Garrison had some ulterior motive and rebuffed every advance with caustic derision. Then he’d been terrified of overstaying his welcome. It had taken him days to gather up the courage to seek Shiro out, and weeks for him to stop rereading every message he sent him, and somewhere along the way, he’d found a friend.

Now Shiro was gone, and Keith had to face that there may have been something that he loved more than flying.

Keith groaned as someone knocked on his door, dragging himself away from his desk with a tired sigh. He already wondered if it was too early to go to sleep.

He opened the door with an unintelligible grunt and froze.

“I thought you might be hungry?”

It was like he’d managed to conjure Shiro right out of his dreams and for a moment, he wasn’t sure if it was real or just some desperate, lonely wish. He was worlds away from the polished Garrison graduate in his freshly pressed pilot uniform, the brave soldier who charmed tv audiences across the world. This Shiro was dressed in a soft, wrinkled grey hoodie, his dark hair plastered down from the rain and a wry smile playing across his lips. He looked young, real. Keith almost tackled him.

“Your launch is in two days, what are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be at mission control?” He asked hoarsely, standing aside to let Shiro inside.

“Probably.” Shiro held up two plastic bags full of take out. “But I thought you might want some Chinese food.”

“You snuck out of mission control to bring me eggrolls.” Keith deadpanned, still too stunned to do much more than close the door as Shiro set everything down in his tiny kitchenette and started pulling out containers. This couldn’t possibly be a real thing, Shiro was too important to come back here just for him and yet the other man was already banging around looking for plates like he belonged here. He drifted closer, knocking his hip clumsily against the counter and too distracted by his guest to even notice.

“They’re really good eggrolls.”

Keith hovered, helplessly caught in Shiro’s gravity. There was no way Shiro even knew the affect he had on people. “You’re going to get in trouble if they realize you’re gone.”

“Let me worry about that, will you?” Shiro’s smile melted any other protest before he could even form the words. “Besides, I’m not going anywhere before I have a chance to say a real goodbye.”

They’d been friends, but Keith had never expected Shiro to ever come back for him no matter how many promises he made. People didn’t come back, he’d learned that lesson early and it had never changed. The only person he’d ever been able to rely on was himself, but Shiro had proved him wrong again.  

“All my forks are plastic,” Keith croaked, a last ditch, desperate effort to get Shiro to see he’d made a mistake, like he could disillusion him before Shiro could look inside his cabinet. Keith was a mess and a half, and he was quietly terrified that this indiscretion would get Shiro kicked from the mission and ruin his career forever.

“On my first year, I brought home an entire fork dispenser just to see if people would notice,” Shiro said, from the vicinity of Keith’s fridge where he was putting in beers.

“Did they?”

“Yeah, but it took like a week.” Then Shiro was by his side, squeezing his shoulder. He looked like he did after losing a particular difficult sparring session, smug but trying to hide it, and Keith watched as a fat water droplet traced down the side of Shiro’s jaw, balancing precariously over the edge before following his throat to disappear under his collar. Keith shuddered.

“I’ll get you a towel.”

And then they were sitting on his floor, a second later, eating straight from the container. Shiro shirtless and still incredibly distracting even with a large, fluffy towel draped over his shoulders, and Keith very eagerly going through his beer. It tasted like he imagine piss would. He spent far too long wondering if this was good beer, if this was the beer Shiro liked, and he was working on his second before Shiro was a quarter way through his first.

His mouth felt weird. He couldn’t remember talking to anyone so much since Shiro left for mission control. Now he couldn’t stop. He felt warm and excited. Outside the storm raged on, but every time Shiro smiled, Keith felt like he held the sun in the palm of his hand.

He watched Shiro tip back his beer and drink it easily without making a face like Keith did every time he tried to swallow. A flush crept up into his cheeks as he finished his drink too fast, trying not to be too obvious with his stare. He had to memorize every small detail, the way every drop of water clung to the ends of Shiro’s hair, the exact sound of his laughter, every single word he spoke. It had to be perfect so he could replay it over the months Shiro was gone and Keith was alone.

“I can’t believe you came back to say goodbye.”

“I wasn’t going to leave without seeing you, you’re my friend and I care about you.”

Keith was silent, trying to wrap his thoughts around the words. Shiro said them so casually, like they were a given. As if people actually came back once they left you. Keith knew better, no one ever came back except Shiro. He still wasn’t sure what that meant. “Before you know it, I’ll be up there flying with you.”

“You’d better!” Shiro said with a laugh, nudging him with a foot. “I’m going to need a co-pilot soon. If the Kerberos mission goes well, they’re lining up a few more deep space flights and I can’t lead them all.”

“Who knows? Maybe I’ll just stow away and ride with you to Kerberos.”

“ _No!_ ” The fear in Shiro’s voice shocked them both and Keith could see the confusion play over his face. Keith couldn’t go to Kerberos, something bad was going to happen and-, and he was being stupid. The other boy had flinched away, already mumbling his apologies and stilled only with Shiro reached out to touch his arm. “No, not Kerberos. You’ve got to graduate first, then I’m sure you’ll be piloting flights out even farther then the edge of the solar system.”

“How about you get us there first?” Keith tried. It sounded weak to his ears, but Shiro laughed again. He hadn’t removed his hand, and it lay warm against Keith’s forearm. Shiro didn’t demand anything, but he was impossible to ignore, and Keith let himself fall.

A little less figuratively than he would have liked.

He reached out for a box of fried rice and forgot to pull away, leaning against Shiro’s side. There was a tense moment, where Shiro wasn’t quite sure what to do with his arm, until it came around Keith’s waist, and the younger man let out a tired sigh, pressing his cheek against his towel. Shiro smelled like fresh morning dew and aftershave, and Keith wanted everything. He almost didn’t hear it when Shiro apologized, the words lost in the way he cleared his throat.

“I think you’ve had too much to drink.” Shiro tried to keep his tone lighthearted, but he couldn’t quite make it. Keith snorted at him, certain he owed his own apology, but Shiro hadn’t moved away. His fingers played with the hem of Keith’s shirt, just ghosting over the skin of his waist, and Keith grabbed another bottle. 

“It was just beer.” It wasn’t just the beer. In the movies, the drunk always lost control, but Keith didn’t think he’d ever had so much clarity. 

“Keith.” It sounded like the beginning of a reproach. One Keith didn’t want to hear right now, didn’t want to hear ever. “I have to tell you something.”

A prickle crept along his nerves and he braced himself. This was it, this was going to be the shoe finally dropping. He told himself he’d been expecting it, even if he knew it was a lie. He’d left himself open and now it was too late to protect himself.

Keith stiffened as Shiro leaned ever closer, readying his anger to cover his hurt. “I’m ready.”

“Hi Ready, I’m Shiro.” They stared at each other for a long silent minute before Shiro doubled over, losing it completely as he laughed at his own stupid joke. “I can’t believe you gave me the perfect set up!”

“That’s not even funny.” Keith tried to argue, but Shiro’s laughter was infectious and he finally gave up trying to resist it, burying his face in his hands and giggling, actually  _giggling_. Shiro had the worst sense of humor, but it never failed to work on him. This was the person he was going to miss most, not the pilot or the newly minted celebrity, but the kind boy with Dad jokes and no shame. They laughed themselves hoarse, helpless and happy as the last of the tension disappeared. They ended up flat on their backs among the empty Chinese food cartons and wrappers, exhausted but grinning.

Maybe it was recklessness or maybe it was bravery or even just sheer stupidity, but Keith let his fingers tangle with Shiro’s on the carpet and blurted out the truth. “I’m going to miss you.”

“I’m going to miss you too, buddy, but it’s only six months. I’ll be back before you know it.”

“No you won’t. You’re going to come back a hero and I’m still going to be stuck here. You’ll mean to visit and we’ll talk sometimes, but this is the start of your life Shiro and I-I..”  _I’m going to miss you being in mine._

Keith shrugged, forcing a smile he didn’t feel. He’d been here before. Maybe not with someone he cared for as much as he did Shiro, but every goodbye was the same. He wanted to be happy for Shiro. No one deserved this more than him; no one was as qualified or as generous, and Keith always knew his best friend was meant for great things. He just wished that he could keep up. 

“Keith…” Then Shiro was leaning over him, trapping against the floor. His towel hung over his shoulders, nearly smacking Keith in the face, and that was funny, far funnier than it had any right to be. A laugh caught in Keith’s throat, as he reached up, sliding a hand around the long curve of Shiro’s throat, and this wasn’t just stupid. It was dangerous. But Keith was already losing everything he didn’t know he needed. It made him push for a little more. 

“Keith, I want you in my life for as long as you’ll have me.”

He pulled Shiro down, barreling straight towards trouble and never hesitating for a moment as he captured the older boy’s lips with his own. He could feel Shiro tense, startled, but coaxed him to give. His lips were soft, parted just enough for Keith to steal a taste of him and dance right at the edge of chaste and eager. When he finally dropped his head back against the floor, Shiro remained frozen, eyes closed.

“Was that okay?”

“I shouldn’t.” Shiro’s voice was huskier than normal and Keith could feel his whole body reacting to the sound. “I can’t. I want to, but I’m your friend and I’m not going to take advantage of you ever.”

“But you want to.” He seized on the words, refusing to let them go. Subtlety was never his strongest suit, the world was black and white, right and wrong. Everyone else just made things so much more complicated than they needed to be.

“We shouldn’t.”

“But you  _want_  to.” Keith repeated and pulled an unresisting Shiro down into another kiss, sliding his fingers through the older boy’s hair. “And I want to. You’re leaving and I want one night with you, that’s all.”  _After that, I can let you go._

Keith didn’t know who he was trying to convince more.

He rolled Shiro onto the ground, pinning him beneath him, and he heard, more than felt the groan that tore through the other man. It was better than anything he’d ever known.

“One night?” Shiro asked, a tremor rippling through each word, as Keith cradled his face between his hands, eyes drawn to the slick wet flush of his mouth, so impossibly pretty, and Keith was finally allowed to look his fill. He repeated the words into Shiro’s mouth, licking him open with eager, hungry kisses that turned sloppy far too quickly. He ran his hands across Shiro’s chest, nothing but a wet towel separating them. Shiro moaned, and it ran like an electric current down his nerves. Keith was going to do everything in his power to make him sound like that again.

There was so much he wanted to do. Everything he’d dreamed of, and so much more that he’d never even let himself put into words. He wanted to touch everything at once, distracted and overwhelmed as he dragged his teeth across Shiro’s flushed lower lip, worrying it as he mapped out the panes of Shiro’s chest. His fingers skittered to his waist, tapping irritably against his skin before moving back up to his arm, squeezing around a bicep. Keith gasped to himself, working down Shiro’s throat before he could put his mouth on him, biting into the thick muscle of his arm.

“Keith.” He’d never heard Shiro say his name like that before, a whispered prayer as strong hands slid up his thighs to grab his ass. Shiro’s hips lifted and he rolled his own to tease against that needy friction between them until Keith’s head spun and he could feel the other man’s cock through the fabric of his pants. One night wasn’t enough time, not after wanting this so long he’d practically memorized the fantasy by now. Only one night to keep him before Shiro was torn away.

His teeth grazed against the dark nub of Shiro’s nipple and he felt the man beneath him shudder. He tried again, teasing with the tip of his tongue before closing his mouth around it, sucking hard until Shiro’s hands tightened against him with a strangled, wordless sigh. He might have been a novice, but Shiro let him take the lead and Keith applied himself with the same focused determination that he did with all his training. Fascinated fingers traced every inch of Shiro’s skin, following each line of his body and marveling at how hard muscle tightened beneath his touch.

Shiro was patient and let Keith take his time to explore, rutting against him in a slow, deliberate rhythm. “I want to see you.” Keith decided, fitting his hips against Shiro’s and moving against him with every drawn out thrust. “I want to make sure I can remember every part of you.”

A warm chuckle rumbled deep in Shiro’s chest as he propped himself up on his arms to steal another kiss. “If that’s what you want.” Before Keith could protest, Shiro had lifted them both easily from the floor. All he could do was wrap his legs around the other man’s hips with an indignant squawk at how effortlessly Shiro could carry him back to the bedroom and lay him down on the sheets folded with military precision.

“ _Hey_.” Keith protested, scowling up at the other man. Shiro quirked a brow, his hands low on his hips, already peeling back his threadbare sweats until Keith could see the sharp cut of his pelvis, and god, he wanted his mouth on that, too. He fell back with a thump, cheeks flushed with color as he met Shiro’s impossibly dark eyes.

“Carry on.”

Shiro laughed, and dropped on top of him with a graceless flop. Keith  _oofed_ as the bed shook, arms winding tight around his best friend’s shoulders. Shiro was still smiling, that blindingly brilliant smile that could still leave Keith speechless. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair! But Shiro leaned in, bumping their noses together, leaving Keith to chase after his mouth, eager for another kiss.

“Slow down. Slow down, Keith. We’ve got time,” he berated, but gently, so gently Keith didn’t want to argue, didn’t want to tell him that the clock was already ticking, and once Shiro left, Keith didn’t know how he would live with himself if he didn’t try everything. He huffed though his nose, trying to cling to his self control. Then Shiro’s hand found his, twinging their fingers together, and he guided Keith’s hand lower, over the front of his crotch. 

“Can I?” Keith whispered, already tracing down the long line of Shiro’s shaft, watching his throat move as Shiro swallowed, finally  _finally_ at a loss for words. “I wanna suck you off. I thought about it a long time. Can I?”

Shiro just nodded mutely, never pushing as he let Keith set his own pace for his first time. The pilot rolled back and put himself on display as Keith’s eyes devoured him like a starving man. He was thick, cock curving back along his stomach and the head flushed red. Balls hung heavy between muscular thighs and glistening beads of precum already gathered at the tip to drip slowly down to the dark, coarse hair low on Shiro’s belly that trailed down.

When Keith wrapped a hand around Shiro’s cock, giving it an experimental stroke, he was rewarded with a breathy groan and smiled as he tried it again. He pushed Shiro’s legs apart, settling himself between his thighs and bending to press feather light kisses against the sensitive skin. Keith’s slick tongue delved between Shiro’s legs, nosing against his balls before dragging his lips up his partner’s length. Shiro went deathly still, eyes fixed with a dark, intense gleam as he watched Keith go to work, transfixed by the sight of the boy’s lips stretched wide around him.

“Fuck!” Shiro grunted the curse, tangling his fingers in Keith’s hair to gently guide him down. His hips stuttered, trying to keep from thrusting up into Keith’s mouth and gagging him. “You’re just so… _fuck_.”

Keith chuckled around him, laving his tongue up the underside of Shiro’s cock before sucking hard enough to pull off with a pop. Pride sang through him, he could make Shiro’s composure break with just a touch. It must have meant he was doing something right.

His fingers were tacky with spit, jaw aching as he opened wide, but Keith couldn’t get enough. He’d wanted Shiro for so long, but he wasn’t ready for the taste of him, the smell of him, wasn’t ready for how needy and eager he would be. His cheeks hollowed out with every desperate suck, and sweat beaded across his brow as he pushed himself lower. Shiro slid down his tongue, hard cock kissing the back of his throat, and he keened so prettily, tugging on Keith’s hair until it slipped through his fingers, fighting everything he knew to keep steady.

Keith was gasping for breath when he pulled away, tasting precum on his lips before he pressed a filthy kiss to Shiro’s belly. He felt the muscles jump beneath his lips, looked up to see Shiro’s eyes half-lidded and unfocused. He looked so wonderfully  _wrecked._

“Tell me what you want, Shiro,” he pleaded, nuzzling against his skin. He kept a hand on Shiro’s cock like he couldn’t stop touching him. His bed was small enough, but Keith kept crowding in, demanding more, demanding everything. “I’ll do anything. Just want you.”

It was hard to think with Keith’s wicked fingers teasing across his body, but Shiro managed to catch his breath enough to draw him up for another kiss, tongue slipping past swollen lips. “Let me show you.” He panted with a grin. “I’ll teach you everything.”

Always the patient mentor, he rolled to press Keith down into the sheets and stripped him bare with practiced efficiency. He settled himself on his partner’s slim hips. He reached for the bottle of hand lotion by the bed, no doubt used for similar, if more lonely pastimes, and slicked his hands as Keith watched with wide, wanting eyes. His hands were cold as they wrapped around Keith’s cock and the boy bucked up against him as Shiro took his time, working the lube down his shaft.

“Tell me if it’s too much.” Shiro murmured, lifting himself up on his knees and slowly sinking down onto Keith’s cock. He took him inch by inch, working him inside until Keith couldn’t stand it, hands gripping tight around Shiro’s hips and thrusting up to bury himself completely.

“S’good.” Keith slurred as Shiro rode him, lost in the tight, slick heat of his body and doing his best to just hold on.

“So good. So good…” Keith was babbling and he couldn’t help it, Shiro’s name fell like a curse from his lips as his grip tightened on his hips. He left crescent shaped indents in dark skin, so deep they threatened bruises, and all he wanted was to move, to feel, to touch, desperate to chase that impossible pressure that engulfed him. He was so deep, Shiro so tight for him. He couldn’t stop from reaching lower, taking Shiro’s ass in hand, spreading his cheeks until his breath hitched, just that much pressure on his greedy, sloppy cunt.

“Keith, come on,” Shiro hissed, tongue gliding over his name like he wanted to fuck it, and Keith  _sobbed_. It took every ounce of self-control to keep from thrusting into that slick heat, intoxicated by the feel of Shiro’s body, silky smooth and agonizingly good. Keith wanted so bad, he would have screamed if Shiro asked him to, almost didn’t even need permission.

A sharp spike of tension jerked through his skull as Shiro tugged on his hair, just hard enough to take his breath away, and Keith shivered all the way down to his toes.

“Keith  _focus.”_  He repeated, but Keith barely heard the words. They fell away to nothing when Shiro looked at him like that, eyes narrowed and feverish, demanding Keith’s obedience as he rolled his hips. Keith ached for him. He had him and he wanted more. He had him and he was already terrified of losing him. There was steel in Shiro’s voice, just shy of mocking as he ground into Keith’s crotch, shoulders trembling with each shaky breath he took. “You’re going to hold on for me, Keith. You’re not going to cum until I do, understood?”

“I can’t!” It was too much, he was already falling apart, but Shiro’s sharp command had him scrambling to try.

“You can. You’re being so good for me, Keith. Just like that, you’re doing so well.” Shiro kept his weight on his knees, eyes fixed on the other boy’s face. He was so beautiful, skin flushed a deep red and glistening from the exertion. Keith’s dark eyes were blown and glassy and Shiro couldn’t keep from cupping his face and tracing his thumb along Keith’s lip. He pressed between them, Keith sucking his thumb into his mouth and rolling his tongue along it.

Keith gave a guttural growl, a wordless plea begging Shiro to stop. To never stop.

“Good job, you’re almost there.” Shiro breathed, finally wrapping his hand around his own aching cock and stroking himself to the edge. It only took a few quick stripes before his breath caught, body tensing down around Keith until the younger boy cried out. He came across Keith’s chest and chin, shooting over his skin and dripping down the planes of his chest.

Shiro gasped for breath, dropping his head as he finally gave the order. “Come for me, beautiful.”

Keith gripped his sides, slamming up in jackrabbit thrusts to meet him and riding hard. Skin met skin with wet slaps and tears gathered in the corners of his eyes. “Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck.” The words slurred together, an unintelligible mantra until he caught on the one that sent him over. “Shiro!”

Every part of his body pulled tight as he spilled deep inside of him, his hips stuttered with each shock of pleasure that left him blind and breathless.

Keith was uncoordinated and over eager, throwing everything he had into a game he barely understood the rules of, desperate to take the lead. Desperate to keep Shiro pinned. It was like the first time they fought.

Shiro took him apart then, and he took him apart now.

Keith’s muscles trembled with exhaustion, every nerve scrubbed raw and aching. He was drifting, and there wasn’t enough air in the room. Heat settled over his skin like a blanket, making Keith fight for every breath, but it was good. It was so damn good. When it was all over, when Keith had nothing left to give, Shiro was there to put him back together.

Keith didn’t realize there were strong arms wrapped around him until he could rest his head against Shiro’s chest. He anchored Keith, with gentle fingers that combed through his hair and a petal soft kisses across his brow, and Keith let himself give in, eyes falling shut as Shiro’s hands spread across his back. Shiro was saying something, the words low and comforting, warm against the shell of his ear, but Keith couldn’t find it in him to care.

“Stay?” He asked, almost too faint to hear, but everything felt heavy, and Keith didn’t think he could bear it without Shiro.

“I’m not leaving you.” He promised, tucking the smaller boy against him. “I’m right here. I’ve got you.”

Keith didn’t want to close his eyes and miss a single moment, but everything was comfortable and hazy tangled together on his tiny bed. "Those were some good eggrolls." He mumbled and felt Shiro rumble with laughter, dropping a kiss on the corner of his mouth.

 _I love you_. Keith wasn’t sure if he actually heard the words or if he was dreaming, but for the first time in his life, those words had meaning.

Only one night, it just wasn’t long enough.

 

* * *

 

The air was heavy and humid, almost too thick to breathe. Sweat dripped in his eyes, stinging and blinding him. He touched the side of his helmet like he could somehow coax the electronics to work. “We need help, can anyone read me? Come in!”

“It’s dead, Shiro.” The boy next to him yanked off his own helmet, damp hair clinging to his head. “We’re on our own.”

Shiro cursed under his breath, scanning the dense jungle. There was no path out, no sense on which direction to take, but if they stayed here they were sitting ducks. Something in the back of his mind clawed for his attention and he held up his hand to quiet the other man.

There was silence.

It hung in the air like an unnatural weight. Something was hunting through the trees, stalking closer but from which direction? He circled slowly, trying to find any sign, any rustle of the leaves to give their enemy away, but the only sound was his own frantic heartbeat drumming in his ears.

Energy bolts ripped through the air with a searing crack and the smell of ozone. Blood sprayed across his face in a wet mist as his partner fell, wide eyed and choking on his own pain.

“ _KEITH!”_

 

* * *

 

Shiro bolted upright, screaming.

Keith kept his distance, at the foot of the bed. He’d been watching for the past five minutes, a line of tension drawn across his shoulders, leaving him frozen in the dim. Because Shiro would want his distance. Keith had never seen him like that, trashing and scrambling for relief, but he knew he couldn’t be pushed. He just did.

“Shiro?”

Shiro turned towards him, his eyes wild and feverish, hair matted across his brow, his teeth gnashed in an ugly, twisted snarl. For one terrifying moment, Keith was sure that Shiro wouldn’t be able to tell him apart from the rest of his unseen demons. Then it passed, and Shiro slumped like a puppet with cut strings, leaning heavily against the wall.

Keith inched closer, his expression softening as the pilot flinched, too dazed to fight back a broken whimper. Keith brushed his fingers against the back of his palm, as he turned on the light. A warm glow chased away the shadows, almost too bright, but Shiro still looked haunted. “Shiro, what happened?”

Shiro scrubbed his hands over his face, looking down at his palms like he wasn’t sure they were his. Keith closed his hands over them, another reckless risk, but Shiro sighed, turning towards him. Keith was only too eager to welcome him in.

“I don’t remember. It was…” His cheek rested on Keith’s shoulder. Everything felt still felt tacky and sore, the smell of sweat and sex still lingering on his skin, but Shiro pressed closer.

“It wasn’t real.” Keith tried, slowly running a hand down his partner’s side. It made Shiro look up at him, something far too honest in his eyes.

“It wasn’t real.” He said again, gentle but insistent, leading Shiro out of hell with quiet words and a careful touch. “You were having a nightmare, I’ve got you.” Keith was always ready to spring to his friend’s defense, but there was no way to protect Shiro from whatever it was that hunted him at night. All he could do was find the parts he recognized in the shell-shocked man, soothing his fears and promising him safety where he could rest.

Keith slid into Shiro’s lap, stroking his fingers through Shiro’s matted hair until the pilot gave a shuddering sigh, wrapping himself around Keith’s frame like he was clinging to a life raft in a storm. Seeing Shiro so terrified shook Keith down to his core, his idol just as fragile and human as anyone else. It meant Shiro could be hurt and the world would burn before Keith let that happen.

“I guess I’m just nervous about the launch.” Shiro had finally gathered himself enough to make excuses, trying to reassure and comfort like he always did but Keith wasn’t having it. He took his friend’s hands, pressing light kisses to each calloused palm before wrapping himself in Shiro’s arms.

One night. How could he let go after just one night?

He didn’t offer any words of advice or prying questions. Instead, he gave himself completely, Shiro’s shield, his sword, his warmth, his heart. Whatever Shiro needed, it was offered without asking and without hesitation. They stayed wrapped in each other for hours, sleep forgotten and counting down each fleeting moment until the first false light of morning spilled through the window.

 

* * *

 

 

The day of the launch, mission control was in turmoil. The staff had been going strong for the last six hours, and the countdown to take off had been in red for twice as long. The press were allowed in a limited capacity near the entrance, sheltered by polished chrome and the promise of the future that was distracting enough for a thousand photo ops and would hopefully keep every nosy reporter satisfied. The team’s family were given more freedom, but only barely. They’d already had their five minutes to take pictures and throw questions at the brave astronauts that were heading where no one had stepped before. Now, they were all out for last minute shots, as the crew prepared to board.

Keith was not supposed to be here.

Yet here he was, with a press badge slung around his neck, right beside a lanyard that proudly proclaimed him as a member of the Galactic Garrison Junior Press. It wasn’t his.

Keith knew he was shooting himself in the foot, taking a risk for no reward. Shiro had said his goodbyes, and Keith had done his best to say his. It wasn’t enough. Now he wanted to pretend that this would be.

Shiro had promised him one night and that was all they were ever going to have, no matter what their intentions were. As soon as the ship launched, his friend wouldn’t be the one coming back. There’d be the hero, the world famous pilot, the explorer who just wouldn’t have time for the kid still taking classes at the Garrison. He told himself that they’d had more than he ever thought was possible, one night of memories was going to be enough to last.

It was a lie and he knew it, it was why he was here twisting the stolen press pass in his nervous hands just to see him one last time.

Keith heard Shiro’s laughter and turned like a flower chasing the sun. He seemed completely at ease talking to his crewmates as the reporters circled around, snapping pictures from every angle. He knew their names from the interviews that played on repeat across ever news station.

“I want to go with you!” Dr. Holt’s daughter threw her arms around her father as her brother ruffled her hair fondly.

“Next time, okay? You’ve got a few years before you can go to space. Once you graduate from the Garrison, then we’ll draft you in the crew.” Matt said as the young girl scowled darkly.

“Don’t worry, Pidge.” Shiro teased. “I’ll take good care of them and I’ll bring them back in one piece.”

She looked at Shiro like he’d suddenly grown a third nostril. “Uh, my name’s  _Katie_.”

Keith saw Shiro hesitate, confused for a second before rubbing his fingers across the bridge of his nose like he did whenever he was getting a headache. “Stop fighting, Shiro.” Matt teased. “You’ll never win against her, I’ve just accepted it.”

His reply was lost in the crackle of the speaker, a disembodied voice booming out over the launch site.

“Kerberos crew, please report to the ship to prepare for launch.”

Keith’s heart sunk to his feet, and he could hate himself for this. If he was in Shiro’s place, he would have been walking on air. This was Shiro’s chance to do something amazing, and Keith was so damn proud of him. He wasn’t going to hold him back. He just wanted to watch him for a little while longer. He had no other choice.

Then Shiro turned towards him from across the room, drawn as if by an invisible hand, and Keith noticed the moment he placed him in the crowd. He watched Shiro’s expression falter. It felt like a knife through his chest, slicing between the soft flesh across his ribs, but Keith gave him the most obnoxious thumbs up he could manage.

_Be great. I’m so proud of you._

Shiro was the best friend Keith had ever known, and Keith was so lucky to have had a moment in his life.

He didn’t expect Shiro to fall quiet. He didn’t expect Shiro to come closer.

Camera snapped around them, blinding flashes of flight and unintelligible babble from curious reporters that surrounded him, but Keith didn’t see any of it. He was fixed on Shiro who crossed the room, vaulting easily over the little barrier to keep the rabble from the mission crew.

One night and then he had to let Shiro go.

He never expected Shiro to keep coming back.

Shiro’s mouth found his and a fire inside of him ignited. His bones were molten, the air stolen straight from his lungs. He was consumed, consuming, breathing each other in until everything else faded to nothing around them. Keith wrapped his arms around Shiro’s neck, lifted almost off his toes as strong arms closed around him.

He gasped when Shiro finally pulled away, barely space enough for whispered words between them. “Wait for me?”

“I love you.” Keith pressed the confession against Shiro’s lips, the truth slipping free from his dizzied mind before he could recover. Shiro kissed him again in front of the whole world until Keith actually believed it.

“I love you too.”

The sound of frantic shutters snapping and harried questions rose in a crescendo, as Keith breathed in, sharing the same air as his best friend. He couldn’t close his eyes, desperate to remember this moment. It was the last he was going to have for the next six months. But not forever.

“Come home.”

“I promise.”

There would be a thousand pictures afterwards, of Keith looking stunned and besotted as his best fiend walked away. The Garrison wold find out that he’d played hooky and stolen school property. Reporters would start sending him emails and turn him into even more of a shut in. His classmates would  _stare._  It didn’t matter. None of that was as important as the way Shiro smiled when he pulled away.

That day, Keith watched Shiro make history.

Six months later, the crew of the Kerberos mission returned, safe and sound.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find Dans's being awesome [here](http://nevertrustastilesthing.tumblr.com/)
> 
> You can find Rune on tumblr at [ Runicscribbles](http://runicscribbles.tumblr.com)


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